Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
