So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
