Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Randomize
