Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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