umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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