My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
