Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Randomize
