i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
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