I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
