Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
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