I could have mohawked her pubes.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
