Your tits are I can't wait for
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Randomize
