i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
