I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
Dude so last night I was eating out my gf and her kitten climbed onto my back and fell asleep. AND SHE DIDN'T NOTICE FOR LIKE 10 MINUTES
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize
