Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize