we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
So gin and wine won't be happening again
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
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