On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize
