The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize