Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
did i just pee glitter
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