I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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