we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
Randomize
