Reggie can tackle my bush.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
