Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Is it weird I can only picture you in my heels naked?
Be proud; I'm a versatile boyfriend
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