It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
There are leaves in my underwear?
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
