There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Randomize
