when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
