I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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