he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
Randomize
