happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize