You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
The best revenge is premature balding
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Hit a parked car with a "property of Jesus Christ" bumper sticker. Wrote out five hail mary's and left it on the windshield.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
