So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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