you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Jessi just used the excuse "it's not you it's me" to get out of getting a lap dance.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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