I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
