jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
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