at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm pretty sure she sent a group text out saying that I was the one to get with her last night and sorry to everyone who didnt make it.
Honestly it was an honor just to be nominated.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
