also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
dude. I can hear the air.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
