i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
Randomize
