reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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