"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
