Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
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