its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
