and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
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