Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Well guess who isn't a virgin anymore
guess who isnt wearing pants has a shaving cream beard and is afraid theres no cream cheese in the fridge
the answer to that last one was me. the answer to the first one is you, you sly dog
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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