overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize