I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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