Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
