It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
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