We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I have already put on my inside pants.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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