TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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