Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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