I'm drive I can fine osifer
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
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