Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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